Skepticism

Just had a four hour long chat with a really good friend of mine from the Philippines. I got to know him during my school’s Youth Expedition Trip in March, and till this day, we’ve been keeping in contact with each other via Facebook.

Words cannot describe how amazing this kid is. Throughout the entire YEP trip, he was the one who taught me so much about life, even though he is just thirteen. They say age is just another number, and I can’t help but to agree. This 13 year old has so much gusto in him, that it makes me ashamed of myself. See, this kid is openly gay and even though he always got bullied for being small-sized and into make-up, beauty pageants and ballet, he never once gave up on himself. He once told me “I am not like paper, I won’t crumple easily. And why should I try to be like others? I’ll just be another clone”. He is just 13, and yet his words of wisdom stayed with me. 

Even after I came back to Singapore, I always wondered how he was doing, and it was during this 4 hour conversation that he informed me of his successful progress as a danseur, and a pageant ‘king’. I can never be any prouder for him. But I always wondered…

How is a 13 so confident, and sure of himself and his future, while I a 19 year old, am still stuck in my own little bubble? I can’t help but wonder what it is like to be in his shoes, and where he got all the courage and optimism from. I wonder when it would be my turn to fully understand myself and where I am heading in life.

I sure could use some help right about now…

Reasons why I suck at being a friend

I have this sick habit of pushing people away just to see if I am worth fighting for in their eyes. However, as much as I want to believe that there are people out there who care, there aren't many. No one actually cares enough, and those who do can only handle this much of the things that I throw at them.

And even though I try my best to ensure that the things I do enable the people around me to be happy, I have never been successful. A little too late, a little too wrong, a little too controlling, a little too weak, a little too hard-hearted, a little too harsh, a little too weird, a little too desperate, a little too emotional, a little too clingy, a little too pathetic.

Friendship

A personal piece that I really had to get off of my chest.

What does the word 'Friendship' mean to you?

When I think about Friendship, the image of two people renting a room together, kicking back on the sofa, eating from a tub of ice cream while crying over a sappy love story comes to mind. Now it might seem pretty far-fetched, but just from this scenario, I can identify my elements of friendship; trust, comfort, support, reliance, happy, vulnerable, open, pure, real, truthful, and emotional.

I always thought that Friendship was a two-way passage, where two individuals were interconnected based on their thoughts, experiences, emotions and actions. However, I failed to realize that everyone has their own interpretations and the experiences that I had gone through lately have widened my perspective to this term.

The reason why I am writing this post is not really because I am confused with the term, but rather, I am confused with my role as a friend. I used to think that as a friend, it meant that one should be a pillar of support, to offer advice to lighten the burden, to be emotionally available just so that one's friend is comfortable in being vulnerable right in front of one, but at the same time, having a sense of security and comfort from the support one is giving. I always thought I was doing the right thing, but it took one incident to make me realize that I wasn't afterall.

I was definitely upset when that person said that he felt like a lab rat, under one of my psychological experiments whereby I run tests to see which advice is the most effective. I was not expecting such a response because I never treated any friendship as a form of experiment. I know that people do interpret one's actions differently, but I never expected whatever that I have done, to cause such a major setback. I did not understand why he felt that way because I always thought that offering advice would be enlightening, but then again, I realized; who was I to offer advice, when I was just another teenager? 

It then made me question my role as a friend, to everyone else in my life. Do the rest feel the same way too? Do they feel oppressed by my suggestions? I wondered to myself, on whether I was being a good friend. If I were in their shoes, I would have definitely hated myself, because sometimes, people just want someone to sit and listen, and not say anything. I on the other hand, was so caught up with trying to make the world a better place, that I forgot how to be a friend.

There may or may not be a solution to this, but no matter what, I hope my friends do feel  my love and appreciation. They are the reason why I am who I am today, because their life story, their beliefs, our experiences, and our conversations shape up my life. And as much as I thankful for their presence in my life, I never want to feel neglected, used or unappreciated.

I hope this change is good.

Pass the Fast

Last Friday, I participated in an event in school called "Pass the Fast". 

Basically, "Pass the Fast" is a one day, or rather, eight hour campaign that aims in raising awareness for those hit by hunger and poverty around the world. This movement is also in conjunction to the 30 hour famine camp (17 - 18 June) organized by World Vision and HMS as part of an outreach initiative. 

I must say it was a fantastic idea from the School of Humanities (and not because I am from that school!) because I personally found it to be really meaningful.

I chose to fast from footwear, and managed to get both Natalie and Iris to fast with me. The reason why I chose to fast from those was because I felt that most of us always took for granted of the privileges and comfort that we have in life, and since I always enjoy walking, I wanted to feel how it would have been like to not have the privilege of owning shoes, and so, I began my 8 hour barefoot journey around the school campus.  

The tenderness of an innocent child's feet on the harsh cruelty of Mother Nature

My experience:

When I first took off my shoes at the Atrium, I suddenly became really self-conscious about the stares I would be getting for being barefooted. Thoughts about people thinking that I am attention seeking, lame, pathetic, were running through my head at that moment. And it was not really helping that I was being a real whiny ass bitch about what I was going through. The roads were blazing hot, and I slipped a couple of times because of the pouring rain in the afternoon. I even dirtied a flight of stairs that a cleaner was mopping, and stepped on a drain without realizing that I was without any footwear. I could literally feel the wrath of Mother Nature on that day, and even though I told the two girls that I regretted this decision, I was kinda' glad I stuck by it for that 8 hours.

 

Even though I ended the day with feet full of blisters, I came to a realization, and that I was the only one creating a mess for myself. I found out that no one really noticed that I was being barefooted, and those who did, only had positive comments and encouragement for what I was doing. And this whole activity made me appreciate the financial stability of my family. As much as I loved squishing in mud and shimmy-ing on slippery floors, walking barefooted from one end to the other was torturous. And I only did it for 8 hours, I wonder how the kids in other part of the world bare it, especially when they have to travel from one end to the other, on tough terrains, by foot. I guess they were not given a choice :(

I am glad though, for this event was an eye-opener, and I am sure whatever that I have experienced would gear me up for the many more adventures that are awaiting me. Till then...

 

Did you pass the fast?

TCP Camp

This post is long overdue. In fact, it was supposed to be posted on the 20th of October, but look how time flies!

Anyways, on to the more important part, this post is about the Leadership Empowerment camp organized by ROHEI, but held for students who are in The Christieara Programme ( or TCP for short) in Ngee Ann polytechnic.

I would not want to reveal how I managed to get into the programme, but I'd just like to say that if you are in Ngee Ann Polytechnic, but are am not in TCP, then you jolly well should find out more to join in! It is definitely a great platform for you to gain loads of experiences and opportunities to grow and shine!

Now, on to the camp! At the start of the camp, all of us found out that we were sorted into different countries. I belonged to Japan, with fantastic groupmates and a mentor who is showing off her biceps (below)

Initially, I thought that the camp was going to be a really boring one, given that I did not know anyone, and I thought we'd have worksheets to complete, and non-stop lectures by the educators, but boy was I in for a surprize!

The 3D2N event was definitely tonnes of fun, with activities such as the paper bag game, lunch unlimited, cross the moat, and tonnes of sharing sessions were conducted. 

*You can scroll all the way to the end of the post to learn more about the activities that were conducted.

However, what I found really interesting about this organization ROHEI that conducted the camp, was of how open minded they were. Sharing sessions simply involved them sitting down in the lounge with us, with a microphone, and just pouring out the many years of fear, hardship, trauma and sacrifice. Mentors like Nick and Calvin really won me over when they shared about how much they struggled when they were young, and how much faith they had in themselves to continue living. The stories shared by all of them were definitely tear-jerking and made me reflect on my own life, and how little I was putting in to make it better for myself and the people around me.

Apart from that, what I really enjoyed most from this camp was the award ceremony and the little skit that they had done up for us on the last day. Campers Ernest, Calissa and Kris definitely deserved the awards for their selflessness, and remarkable personality, heart and everything else that was positive. 

On a whole, the camp really brought out the best in everyone, and made us deeper thinkers, of who we are and who we want to be.  The activities not only made us work stronger as a team, but it opened up our minds and hearts to other people. It was definitely an emotional roller-coaster for me, but I am glad that I came out to be a much better person than I was before the camp.

On to the games!

Paper bag game

This activity is actually taken from a real-life situation. Each country was considered as a family, and we were migrating to India to start anew. However, with no money, and no lodging, we had to resort to selling paper bags to earn a living.

So the entire activity was pretty much like a simulation, whereby there was a loan shark who would loan us money to buy glue, scissors and newspapers, corrupted officials from the government who would catch us illegal immigrants every time they went for a patrol and would only release them if we bribed them, rent collectors who visited us at intervals, and the shops that gives us money only when our paper bags are of approved quality. 

This activity was the most frustrating of them all because not only were our members imprisoned, but the officials always confiscated our items, leaving us with so desperate that my team had to steal other group's papers, and even formed an alliance with some so salvage whatever that we had. Even though all the groups did horribly, we all managed to learn a couple or two important stuff from this activity. 

Lunch unlimited

All of us were told to draw lots from a mystery box, which had either the letter A, B, or C. I got the letter C, and to be honest, I thought that it was going to be like some sort of Fear factor series. Fortunately, it was not. The three letters were of the three different social statuses, the rich, the average and the poor, and I happened to be in the group that was poor! So while the rich had fine dining, and the average ate out of Bento boxes, the poor people ate bread, on the floor. However, halfway through lunch, people from the other two social statuses started coming over to offer us food, and all of us poor people were actually shockec/surprised/touched! From what seemed like a pathetic meal, all of us were really glad that we were not forgotten and people actually sacrificed their meals for us. An emotional experience indeed. 

Cross the moat

Cross the moat was another frustrating activity because we had to repeat the task over and over again. We were supposed to move from the start to the the end of the river by following the numbers. Sounds simple? Here comes the tricky bit, each number had to have at least one feet, and maximum two feet on it at all times, and we had to move as a team. However, the toughest bit was that the numbers were all jumbled up and we had to really rely on everyone's strength and support to complete the task together., and we had to do this all in silence!  What I learned from this activity was that repetition sometimes enables one to learn from one's mistakes, and to also ignore snide and criticisms and just focus on our task, and not be distracted and too quick to give up. 

Another activity was done using pebbles. Before that, we were tasked to work as a team in a treasure hunt, and from that activity, we were taught about synergy, and how important teamwork is. The example that was used was chopsticks; of how brittle they were as one, but strong and sturdy when a bundle of them were held together. The pebble was then used to signify us. We were told to reflect on ourselves, of how good we really were, and how far we had travelled, and we used the pebbles to store all the untruth, burdens, and things that were hindering us and when we were told to let go of the pebbles, we had to literally let go of all the troubles that we had in us as well.

The skit

This skit was special because all the mentors were involved. They were a bunch of people who wanted to travel overseas but each time they stepped through, the guards would stop them. Even though they tries their hardest to find solutions, they gave up eventually. They couldn't help but deem themselves as failures, cowards, useless, hopeless, and unwanted. Out of the blue, someone came along and provided them with comfort and reassurance, and with a new boost of confidence, they all started believing in themselves again, and managed to pass through the guards.

It might not sound as touching as it actually is, so you've got to see it to actually believe and feel it.

Lastly, during our last sharing session, one of the campers shared something really meaningful. He said something like "when we are proud, we bring our wall up against people, but if we bend over to help, we form a bridge. So why can't form a bridge and help each other cross over together".

I am not exaggerating when I say that this camp is life changing. It really is. I do hope that many other youths would get to experience this and enjoy it as much as I have.

To end this post, here is a quotation:

Being vulnerable doesn't have to be threatening. Just have the courage to be sincere, open and honest. This opens the door to deeper communication all around. It creates self-empowerment and the kind of connections with others we all want in life. Speaking from the heart frees us from the secrets that burden us. These secrets are what make us sick or fearful. Speaking truth helps you get clarity on your real heart directives.-- Sara Paddison

Till then

When nothing ticks you more than that

Edited.

I am actually not in a good mood right now, because of one very idiotic bitch that pissed me off.





I actually deleted the later part of the post because I find it really insensitive to post everything here. She may have hurt my feelings but I shouldn't be hurting hers. Because it'll make me no different from her.



I am learning to change.Till then.



Loves.

Rebirth

Just a couple of days ago, my mum and I were lazing around, looking at the clouds in my room when she suddenly brought up a topic.


"If you could be anything, anything at all, what would you be?"


I know that this might sounds like a common topic to bring up among friends, but trust me, it's really hard to find the right answer that you'll be satisfied with.

She related one such situation when she asked her friend the same question, and the friend's answer was really odd. Well, at least to me. Because she wanted to be a Princess.





Literally a Princess or one that she dreams to be, with crowns, thrones, royalty, Prince Charming, a palace and lots of gold, or in a bed made out of money.





Both my mum and I found it pretty odd to want a life of someone in the limelight. Because, being a Princess, not only does one have to be dressed and speak proper, you're practically stripped from having a 'Normal Life'.


We then talked about our choices, and we listed all the animals we wanted to be. We were practically sick of the "Human" world, and so both of us thought that it'd be interesting to be an animal.


As usual, we picked our favourite animals, but it pretty much ended with us wanted to be something that was able to fly. My mum preferred to be a butterfly for birds are shot at and hunted for, and she'd rather lay her eggs, her kids, and then die, like all insects do.


That was when I thought of the Eagle.





Whenever I meet someone who asks about my goals in Life, they end up pretty much saying the same thing, and that is to 'Soar like an Eagle'. Everyone wants to be like an Eagle, a majestic creature that rules the sky.


But little do they know of how much suffering the eagle has to go through in order to soar through the skies every single year.

Just watch this clip:

Rebirth of the Eagle

View more presentations from snopesbinary.

Just watch this clip:

This story was first shared by the great people when I attended Adam Khoo's ''I'm Gifted, So Are You!" workshop, and I have heard/watched many clips online.

They mentioned of that every eagle has to make a very important decision; to live, or to die. It's because at about the age of 40, the eagle physical condition is so bad, its talons lose flexibility and are unable to secure a proper grip on the prey, the beak becomes dull and to bent, and the feathers are so thick and heavy that it disrupts the eagle's ability to fly well.

It then flies to its nest, way up in the mountains, and begin this torturous 5 month rejuvenating process where it knocks off its beak by hitting it against the rocks over and over again. Then it plucks out its talons and lastly, its feathers, one by one. This is so that the eagle can "regrow" the removed parts in order to survive another 30 years.


Torturing isn't it?


Well, you're actually in for a surprise. Because......












Whatever that I said earlier about the eagle, it's all a MYTH(I just so happened to check it out on the net a couple of days ago). In fact, there had been so many viewers wondering about the process of the eagle, that the University of Minnesota's Raptor Center and The American Bald Eagle Information Website have both responded to this issue.


Click Here to Read what The American Bald Eagle Information Website said

Click Here to Read what the University of Minnesota's Raptor Centre said


And no, I'm not saying that Adam Khoo's workshop or the clips are bogus. In fact, the clip is quite true when it applies to us, humans, than to the eagles. Because it shows that in order to live on and be successful in the near future, one has to be able to let go of the past and move on. Or as how the saying goes "In Order To Rebuild, You Must First Tear Down".


And that my friends, is an important lesson to learn.



As for what I want to be if I ever get the chance to, I'd like to be The One who controls everything that happens on Earth (I'm not allowed to say His name for I do not have a religion and may be doomed to burn in Hell). It would be fine even if it were to be for a day. I would just like to reshuffle some things, here and there.



Loves.

'Peace' sign with the Index finger down.

I am no pro when in comes to blogging, but I for one feel that those who blog about their personal grieves, are the emptiest of the lot. Not only am I pointing to those who blog, but also to those who whine (pretty ironic, since I'm the one with the whiney URL) about their lives.


You see, we often assume that Life is about suffering. We are so engrossed in trying to gain fame and wealth in order to survive, that we pretty much lose sight of the main goal, in other words, forgetting what we were here for.


So why are we fighting so hard to survive? It's because we want to live in comfort, being able to witness all the wondrous things around us, that makes us not only tolerate the hardship, but to enjoy Life as well.


Life isn't about the fame, the fortune nor the knowledge. It is the ability to use these 'tools' to make our lives better, to make the people around us happier, and to make the world a better place for all of us.


Working and even studying without a purpose, is like laying in your coffin, waiting for death to leech the life out of you. Why wait to for death to arrive miserably when you can fill the numbered (just that we are not sure of the numbers yet) days with enriching, enlightening and wonderful thoughts and activities?


No man should be judged by his wealth or knowledge, but how he is able to hide his misery from the world with a simple weapon; his smile. It's people like him that I look up to, and wonder whether he can teach me a lesson or two about Life.


'Happiness' can not be bought, nor can it be sold. No books, websites or any other resources can teach you about happiness. They can share scenarios and stories where people experience happiness. But nothing can teach you how to achieve happiness.


So how do you gain happiness? Well, it all depends on yourself. The joy you feel when you achieve something, the emptiness inside when you're alone, fear and heartbreak alike, are part and parcel to your steps towards happiness. Happiness is found deep within your soul. And it's only when you are able to find the strength to overcome your 'issues' then you will find happiness.


It is often said that 'Life is too short', but scratch that, for Life is the longest stretch of days, hours, minutes and seconds that I know of. So don't be afraid to stand up to what you believe in. Your life is your own, and it shouldn't be mapped out by others.


Your rule, your game, your time.


As easy as it may sound, happiness is not going to willingly fall into your arms. So search within yourself and find a truer, deeper meaning to your Life.




Loves.

Back to School!

Yesterday did not go as well as I planned.


I slept pretty late the previous night, and so I obviously woke up late, around 1 plus. Well, I was supposed to head back to school at 1pm.

Anyway, I made my way there, and at the gates I saw fellow school mates, like Samuel. I entered the school and that was when all the problems started.


The security guard stopped me and didn't let me in, because I had dyed hair and because there were several studs on my ears. I tried calling my juniors and teachers, but no one picked. It was pretty embarrassing, having to stand there while others could go in.


The security guards did apologize, but I don't blame them. Well, they were simply doing their jobs.


Well, I did take it for granted that I was an alumni, and could go in as and when I wished, but I was proven wrong. While standing there, the security guards actually told me that there were other cases, where a boy had to go home to change because he came in shorts. And Apple who works in our book shop, wasn't allowed in because she had a tattoo, but she was later let in because she wasn't a student, but because she worked there.

Even parents were questioned before they were allowed to sign in.


I was told that I had to actually come back in school uniform because I have not collected my certificate.


I admire the school for their discipline, but I do question where they draw the line.



Anyway, after standing there for about an hour, Ms Lim came to my rescue with Ms Choo! We talked for awhile and then I actually went back to Admiralty, to "dye" my hair. Then, I headed back to school.


I was greeted by Qian Wen, whom I almost lost my pants to by her "Cling-Wrap" hug. Hahah. It was really nice to see some of the teachers, and friends who went back to help out too.


Well, good times do not last long, and before we knew it, everyone were packing up to head home. Jayda, Cheryl and I then headed to the hall to watch the performances. They were pretty neat, but I was paying more attention to the Seconday ones. There were a few familiar faces; the kids which I looked after back when I was a prefect in Primary School. Cheryl and Jing Yee's siblings were in this batch too.




I did spend a great day reminiscing the "good ol' days". But I did see some unpleasant people there. But after that day, I have finally decided to let it go. He and Her may not have made my life in school a good one, but I'm fine with them now, so long as they keep their distance. I hate making enemies, and I would never treat anyone with disrespect, unless they do the same to me. But I guess it's not worth it, after all, wouldn't you be like them if you treated them like how they treated you?


So to the Him and Her, let's bury the past okay? I am sure I have.



Loves.

Def Jam Poetry

My brother just introduced this programme called "Def Jam Poetry" on Youtube. It's really interesting because it's about people who say put their opinions, truth, their lives and experiences in the form of poetry.


Here's the ones that I like alot. Enjoy!







Mc Lyte talks about her ups and downs in her Life and career.





Shihan - Sick and Tired








Love Poem








The Gift





Stinky Breath

This one is pretty funny.







Nothing is for Nothing








Well there are definitely more to see and hear. If you are interested, you can Click Here!



Loves.

Aries

One thing that I always read online or at the Popular Bookstore would be about Horoscopes. I don't know if it sounds funny, but I like reading about my sign, and then compare the past incidents with the description given. And then I would analyze whether it can be trusted or not. Sometimes I do keep note of the incidents that have not happened, and ironically once it does happen, I would have a mental "check" and tick it against the "things the horoscope book said". But one thing I believe strongly in the description of the Horoscopes is when they are talking about our characters. As much as I hate to admit, they are actually very true!



Here's mine: Click Here

What's your sign?

Live Your Life

Have you ever been in a situation where you didn't want to lie, yet couldn't tell the truth?

Have you ever been in a situation where you said something but never meant it?

Have you ever been in a situation where you were so afraid of what others thought about you that you had to lie, in order to be noticed?

Have you ever tried being noticed or successful by doing something that you knew was wrong?

Have you ever feared whether others hated you?

Have you ever had doubts in yourself?





I admit that I agree to some of the things mentioned above. I did things, many stupid things just because I was bored, or because my friends did them.

I used to doubt myself and was worried about what others thought about me. I tried my best to change myself, to please the others. But I failed to do one thing, the very one thing that means the most to us; to please myself with who I was. I did not like who I was, and so I slowly pulled away from them, and be who I wanted myself to be.


The past few years, especially in Secondary School, had put me in many situations where I was in a dilemma, to whether or not lie, or tell the truth. Sometimes I chose to lie, sometimes I told the truth. Both ways, I gained and lost friends. But I was sick of it.


Some people think that lying is the greatest sin of all, and that liars, are not good enough to have friends. Well, I'd say that's just some made up crap. Everyone lies. I lie not because I want to, or because I did something bad. But it's because of protecting someone or something. But again, I'm sick of it all.



That is why, I am sort of glad to leave secondary school life, leaving all the bad incidents behind. And just living my Life.




Live Your Life Video

Goals and Priorities

Whenever I needed time to reflect or come up with ideas, I would take a long, hot bath. It was my "thinking hat" where I gather the day's events and think through what I did, and could have done to make things better. Or simply to think of what I'm going to do next.


Today's bath made me think through about my goals and priorities in Life.

Since young, my plan was to be in the Education System. I wanted to be the unique one, teaching the kids things that textbooks don't teach, things that you learn in Life. And year after year, I grew more into that ambition, mainly thanks to my mum, whom I help whenever she teaches the kids at work. And through her, I got to see how teachers ( her colleagues and herself) use different methods to teach the kids.

One teacher uses a lot of paper. Everything was learned through paper. It was interesting but kids, with short attention spans, always disliked her class.

Then there was another teacher. She used songs and stories to teach the kids. It was really interesting, but the kids, some of them, had no idea what the teacher was talking about, and so , I guess they tuned out.


Then there was my mum. What I liked about her class, whenever I had the chance to sit in, was that every lesson, she would definitely involve the kids.

One of the memorable lessons was about sea creatures. She made turtle shells from cardboard, fish scales from the perforator and claws from papier-mâché for the kids. She and the kids then wore them and together they swam like a fish, walked like a crab and glided like a sea turtle, on the floor. This was of course accompanied by a made-up story that she created as they played along.

This inspired me as I noticed how much the kids were enjoying themselves. I wanted to be just like her.


And over the years, I grew more and more in love with the passion to teach. And this inspiration pushed me further into wanting to teach the special needys.


I wanted to follow that dream, but as I grew older, one of the greatest sin of all, Sloth took a liking to me. It was only attracted to me whenever I was studying, but left me alone when I was in sports or other things that I liked. Thus, my studies were affected. This phase of Life, was the one I hated the most, because my cousins from my dad's side were always comparing their results with me. It was agonizing, and I hated their visits.

I was spurred to prove that I was intelligent and I could score good grades. I forced myself to study day in and day out, till one day, I could'nt take it anymore. I stared blankly and I questioned myself, which was more important, proving them wrong and stressing myself out, or simply be who I wanted to be. And I chose the latter.

Some of you may think that it's stupid and stuff to choose to "slack" more than study, but I guess I just can't force myself hard enough to study. As most of my friends say it, I have a very much "bo-chap" attitude. It may be bad for some things, and good for others. But this is one choice I will never regret.

My mum sometimes blames herself for being the one who did not push me and my brothers hard enough in our studies. That was why my dad disappointed in us, who always lost academically to my cousins.

But my brothers and I always thanked her for not pushing us, as this bonded us closer than any other families I know. Besides, what's the point of having good education, when you have sucky attitude and no respect for others?

Well, I still do push myself for the things I want, but if I can't get, I wouldn't be devastated. Because, maybe it's just not meant for me.

But nevertheless, I'll still work towards my dream, and that is to be an Educator.


I then shifted to the priorities in my Life; Family, Education, Career, Friendship and Love.

It's funny how some teens till now, have this ridiculous mindset of "I'll love him/her forever and ever. I'll die because I can't live without him/her. My life's worthless without him/her".

It always cracked me up because these were mere words that you say in attempt for the other party to feel touched. Come on, can't live without that person? Then how did you live your life before you knew that person?

And Life being worthless without that person? Well, pity your mum who had to go through 9 months of labour to bear you. I mean you wouldn't want her efforts of bringing you up, go to waste isn't it? If you disagree, then you're an ass.

I am someone who believes in Love. But I think at my age, it seems more like puppy love than true love. I don't think I would have the time, effort and willingness to bother, to be in a relationship. Unless someone can change my mind, Love's going to be the last.


Family is definitely the first. Who would swop anything or your own flesh and blood?

Friends come next. I know some might think that Education is more important. But to me, friends, especially family friends who go through with me as much as my own family does, mean the most to me.

I know some friendships do not last as long as a couple of years, but I'd like to live it as that, because you never know who might need your help or vice versa.


I just do hope most of my friends become family friends too, so we're inseparable.


The other two are more of an in-between. Have not thought hard enough to find a placing for them.








I'll end this post with something that happened to me a few days back.


M = Me, G = Guy who was distributing something.


Here goes.


A couple of days ago, I was walking around town, apparently meeting someone, and out of the blue, G, popped infront of me. He was held out something to me. I wasn't looking at it, instead I was looking at him, because he looked handsome for a Chinese Guy.

M: Hi, what's this? * Still looking at him*

G: You want cow poon?

M: Huh?

G: You want cow poon?

M: Urh.... * For that moment, I swear it was really awkward*

I then made an attempt to look at what he was holding.

M: Oh! Coupons! Yes, thanks. *Quickly walks away before embarrassing both of us*


This tragedy was the same as the moment I laid eyes on eye candy : Tom Kaulitz from Tokio Hotel. He's hot, but once he starts speaking. Haiyoh, spoils everything. Hahaha.


Bye, and all the best to the 'O' level graduates, tomorrow's the last of the Major papers!



And Happy Anniversary Mum and Dad!

It's funny though

When you find dislike someone, then everything about him is annoying; from the words coming out of his mouth, to his actions, even just to his mere presence. Everything about him would seem so wrong that the slightest movement would make you want to skin him alive. And everything about him is UGLY.












And here's the irony, when the exact same actions and words are done and said by your friend or your crush, it can't be helped but to chuckle, start off in a conversation with them or even sing in praise of their looks.





What is Anger such a strong tool that it can make two similar scenarios (with the same plot but with different people) end in total different endings?






ANGER





VS.





HAPPINESS









This year has been an in-between year for me. But now, I'm feeling like.....

Once Upon A Time..

There was once a little girl, Katie, who lived in a little house in a faraway land.

Katie was beautiful. She had black hair that flowed opulently down her back. Her face was doll-like, with flawless skin and eyes that resembled shimmering opals. She was a quiet and shy child and no one could hardly hear her speak. But when she did, it was like magic. Such mellifluous voice could embrace anyone with so much warmth, that it could melt your heart. She was adorable, and she had the passion to sing.


And even though it seemed so picture-perfect, Katie was not happy at all. She was a poor orphan who lived with a stranger. The stranger was her saviour, because he was the one who pitied and sheltered her from the streets where the vicious war had left her, without a single relative.


The saviour went by the name of Mr. Jonkins. He was a stout old man, with calloused fingers that wobbled as he heaved himself about with a walking stick. He was as ancient as a grandfather clock and every step seeped energy out of him, making him breathless. Thus, he could not work. And so, Katie was his servant.


But Katie did not mind. In fact, she was delighted that she could repay his kindness by taking care of him. She was clad in dirty old rags that wrapped around her fine body, revealing her slender and feminine physique. She scrubbed at the tiles on the floor, washed the toilet, made the bed, and even massaged the old man every single day.

She was never bored and she never complained. All she did, was sing, while she did her chores. Her singing entertained the old man, and he often praised her. She was always as delighted at receiving his comments, as a kid receiving candy.


She promised herself that she would continue singing, so long as the old man lived.


But things took a dratic turn one day, when ......








To be continued.








Hey, I know it's pretty random to be story-telling here. But I've always wanted to share "self-created stories" in my blog. I'm not good at it, but I'll still try to improve.

The reason why I love stories so much is because it is very much like our Lives.
Stories are created with our own twists and ending. And our lives too are created with twists and ending. How we respond to each action in Life, determines the next chapter of the story.

All of our lives are stories yet to be completed. And it is definitely up to us, to decide what happens next.

Stress

What is stress?



Is it a self-planted feeling that you put in place when you see others freaking out?

Is it the desperation to break down because you can't meet the deadline?

Is it the sort of feeling where the whole world seems to not understand you, and that you're left on your own to deal with everything?

Is it the period of time for you to turn anorexic?

Is it the time to roll your eyes at every low-class peasant, and punch the high class bimbos?

or is it...






From wikipedia.org:

stress /strɛs/ Pronunciation Key - Show Spelled Pronunciation[stres] Pronunciation Key - Show IPA Pronunciation
–noun
1. importance or significance attached to a thing; emphasis: to lay stress upon good manners.
2. Phonetics. emphasis in the form of prominent relative loudness of a syllable or a word as a result of special effort in utterance.
3. Prosody. accent or emphasis on syllables in a metrical pattern; beat.
4. emphasis in melody, rhythm, etc.; beat.
5. the physical pressure, pull, or other force exerted on one thing by another; strain.
6. Mechanics. a. the action on a body of any system of balanced forces whereby strain or deformation results.
b. the amount of stress, usually measured in pounds per square inch or in pascals.
c. a load, force, or system of forces producing a strain.
d. the internal resistance or reaction of an elastic body to the external forces applied to it.
e. the ratio of force to area.

7. Physiology. a specific response by the body to a stimulus, as fear or pain, that disturbs or interferes with the normal physiological equilibrium of an organism.
8. physical, mental, or emotional strain or tension: Worry over his job and his wife's health put him under a great stress.
9. a situation, occurrence, or factor causing this: The stress of being trapped in the elevator gave him a pounding headache.
10. Archaic. strong or straining exertion.
–verb (used with object)
11. to lay stress on; emphasize.
12. Phonetics. to pronounce (a syllable or a word) with prominent loudness: Stress the first syllable of “runner.” Stress the second word in “put up with.” Compare accent (def. 18).
13. to subject to stress or strain.
14. Mechanics. to subject to stress.



[Origin: 1275–1325; (n.) ME stresse, aph. var. of distresse distress; (v.) deriv. of the n.]

—Related forms
stressless, adjective
stress·less·ness, noun


—Synonyms 8. anxiety, burden, pressure, worry.
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Every living creature faces and has to deal with stress.

Let's start with ourselves.

When you're a sperm swimming up to the egg, you're stressed out because...

a)You only have one tail, and that makes it harder to swim faster
b) You have to beat the other millions of clones to reach the egg first.
c) Everyone else looks like you and you don't have your own style
d) The egg's membrane is so hard to penetrate through.




When you're in the womb of your mom, you're stressed out because ....

a) You're claustrophobic
b) You have to swim about in the Amniotic Fluid
c) You're feel like removing the umbilical cord attached to your belly button, because you can't scratch you belly but you can't because it's the only way for you to get food.
d) You're sick and tired of eating the same food that your mom eats over and over again.
e) You hate it when your mom visits the doctor as they invade your privacy and spot your gender. The meaner parents aborts you if they don't like your gender.
f) You're annoyed at how your parents don't understand you. When you kick in her belly, instead of letting you out, she goes "oooh, he's kicking!"




When you become a kid, you're stressed because....

a) You are ashamed of your parents who talk to you like a bunch of retards, going "goo-goo gaga, mum-mum, pee-pee, poo-poo, orh-orh" and all.
b) They keep rattling the baby rattle in front of your face and you don't like it.
c) They make you wear pink(girl) and blue (boy).
d) They get all excited over the littlest and dumbest things like you did.
e) They make you pee and poo in bowls that looked like Abraham Lincoln's hat.
f) They make you wear funny looking absorbers (diapers) that does nothing good but give butt rash.
g) They throw you into a swimming pool and brag that you can swim naturally.
h) They laugh when you choke on your drink
i) They take videos of you and send them to Youtube, America's funniest home video, or simply
show it to the entire world.
j) They make you wear noisy squeaky shoes that annoy you more than the neighbour trying to
sleep.




When you become an Adolescent, you're stressed because...

a) You have a zit
b) You had a bad hair day
c) Your crush (that belongs solely to you) was talking to another girl
d) Your crush (that belongs solely to you) didn't turn to look or wave at you
e) Your other half dumped you
f) You think you're not attractive (anymore)
g) Someone forgot your birthday
h) No one complimented on your new look ie : new hairdo, mascara, shirt, jeans etc...
i) The teacher/Principal wants to see you.
j) Your parents don't let you go out
k) Your parents didn't give you an allowance
l) You think no one understands you and thoughts of suicide come to mind
m) No one cares whether you're attempting suicide (fake or real).


When you become an Adult, you're stressed (not that sure on this one, as I am still a teen) because.........

a) No one irons for you your clothes, so you have to do EVERYTHING on your own
b) You don't have enough money
c) Inflation
d) You don't have time for leisure
e) The petrol prices are increasing
f) There is always traffic jams on your way to ANYWHERE
g) Your boss is so demanding. And he wants you to do EVERYTHING, even to make coffee.
h) There are so many tight datelines (dead lines) for you to meet
i) Your house is so messy, and the rents/ bills aren't paid.
j) More ERP on the way



Life's so stressful. So how do you cope?




You don't have to see a doctor, psychiatrist or do any voodoo on your boss.


Just...









And do a little prayer for yourself: