Random Updates

A couple of weeks ago:

Sleep has left me ever since PPCM paper ended. Somehow, I can't seem to head to bed on time, or early enough to not see the sunrise.

Don't get me wrong, watching the Sun rise is actually beautiful. It gives you a moment to recompose yourself for a whole new day, with new experiences and adventures. It is like an energy restorer; like a breath of fresh air. You've got to experience it for yourself. Breath-taking moment, and nothing can come in second to it. That's why I want my funeral (Click Here to read about my funeral plans) to be held before Sun rise, because it marks a whole new beginning to my Life (or soul) and also because, when I was younger, I thought that Sun rise marked the time for all the wandering souls to head back to where they came from, after watching their loved ones tucked themselves to bed of course. Thus, I want my family and friends to watch over me for the very last Sun rise before I begin my rounds, watching over them (No, I'm not insane, suicidal or being emo.).


After sidetracking so much, back to the bit about the sleepless night. Well, I did try various ways to fall asleep. One of them was to read a book, but I got hooked on to the book (managed to finish 4 books in a week, and unsurprisingly, yelled at by mum because I wasted money buying the books as they'll be chucked in my shelves despite re-reading them) that I'd rather lose sleep to finish up the book (at least it was interesting enough for me to finish reading it).


Since that didn't work, I tried other methods like tuning in to the radio, watching t.v and surfing the net, but every interesting topic that I hear or chance upon, would have me ending up searching more about it through the net. So that didn't work either.


So I ended up every night, or rather dawn, forcing myself to fall asleep by shutting my eyes real tight, day dream or stare out my window (apparently scaring myself to sleep with 'Nenek Keropok' or anything else didn't work either) till I eventually for asleep.


Well, it did work for the first couple of days, but somehow or rather, my body got used to it, so much that I ended up staring blankly till I became hungry. Then out I'd be, in search for food.


The lack of sleep hasn't done much damage to me physically, but it sure has darkened my eye bags (amazingly darker than I'd expect my skin to go, almost rotting black. MEH)


A week ago:

The sleep issues are back. My mum says I'm going blind from all the late night surfing and reading. I think she may be right. Every time I close my eyes or go to sleep, it seems as though bright lights (almost like blinding flash lights) are flashing at(?) my eyes(And no, I wasn't staring at any bright light source whatsoever). In the day, the bright lights would disappear, but there were mini stuffs moving everywhere around me, or at least where my eyes were focusing at(like the heat you see coming from the tarmac on a hot day). Being me, I checked it up on the net, and This kind of had the answers to it, but I don't think I really understand. Heh.



A couple of days ago:

I think it was a day or two before the 'Hungry Ghost Festival' ended. All I could remember was waking up at 3am, to see the door on my wardrobe close by itself.


Now:

Sleep has finally come back to me, but I've been having bad dreams lately. Like last night, I dreamt that my house was on fire. Someone threw something into/something landed at my place and everything started burning up, even Junior. It was so real, I could feel the heat. Perspiration from the heat and panic made it worst as I watched almost charred yet very much alive Junior trying to get the flames off of him. I poured a bucket of water over him and carried his limp body to the bath tub. He looked horrible and I felt nothing but pain.



No one was at home, except him and I (worst combination in the world, if you know me well enough) and Junior. I wasted no time, trying to put out the flames which was everywhere; the curtains; the floor; the ceiling. It was as if my house was covered with kerosene and someone had torched it!


And while I was busy saving the house all he did was ask "What happen?" and "Who did it?", never lifting a finger to help, just the same as he is now in real Life. And despite being in that dream (unreal?) I felt like beating him up. I guess the hatred for him is so great that it can even appear in dreams.


The dream was so real that when I woke up, my body was all tensed and warmer than usual, as though I had been standing under the hot sun. I immediately sprang off of bed to find Junior, only to have him curiously staring at me from the end of my bed. I don't think I've ever hugged anyone or anything as much as I did to Junior immediately after that dream. Poor him, must still be wondering if I'm on drugs or not. But I just hope this never happens. I can't bear to see Junior in that state, EVER.



But this isn't the only dream that I had. I think I'm going crazy soon...




Till then.

Rebirth

Just a couple of days ago, my mum and I were lazing around, looking at the clouds in my room when she suddenly brought up a topic.


"If you could be anything, anything at all, what would you be?"


I know that this might sounds like a common topic to bring up among friends, but trust me, it's really hard to find the right answer that you'll be satisfied with.

She related one such situation when she asked her friend the same question, and the friend's answer was really odd. Well, at least to me. Because she wanted to be a Princess.





Literally a Princess or one that she dreams to be, with crowns, thrones, royalty, Prince Charming, a palace and lots of gold, or in a bed made out of money.





Both my mum and I found it pretty odd to want a life of someone in the limelight. Because, being a Princess, not only does one have to be dressed and speak proper, you're practically stripped from having a 'Normal Life'.


We then talked about our choices, and we listed all the animals we wanted to be. We were practically sick of the "Human" world, and so both of us thought that it'd be interesting to be an animal.


As usual, we picked our favourite animals, but it pretty much ended with us wanted to be something that was able to fly. My mum preferred to be a butterfly for birds are shot at and hunted for, and she'd rather lay her eggs, her kids, and then die, like all insects do.


That was when I thought of the Eagle.





Whenever I meet someone who asks about my goals in Life, they end up pretty much saying the same thing, and that is to 'Soar like an Eagle'. Everyone wants to be like an Eagle, a majestic creature that rules the sky.


But little do they know of how much suffering the eagle has to go through in order to soar through the skies every single year.

Just watch this clip:

Rebirth of the Eagle

View more presentations from snopesbinary.

Just watch this clip:

This story was first shared by the great people when I attended Adam Khoo's ''I'm Gifted, So Are You!" workshop, and I have heard/watched many clips online.

They mentioned of that every eagle has to make a very important decision; to live, or to die. It's because at about the age of 40, the eagle physical condition is so bad, its talons lose flexibility and are unable to secure a proper grip on the prey, the beak becomes dull and to bent, and the feathers are so thick and heavy that it disrupts the eagle's ability to fly well.

It then flies to its nest, way up in the mountains, and begin this torturous 5 month rejuvenating process where it knocks off its beak by hitting it against the rocks over and over again. Then it plucks out its talons and lastly, its feathers, one by one. This is so that the eagle can "regrow" the removed parts in order to survive another 30 years.


Torturing isn't it?


Well, you're actually in for a surprise. Because......












Whatever that I said earlier about the eagle, it's all a MYTH(I just so happened to check it out on the net a couple of days ago). In fact, there had been so many viewers wondering about the process of the eagle, that the University of Minnesota's Raptor Center and The American Bald Eagle Information Website have both responded to this issue.


Click Here to Read what The American Bald Eagle Information Website said

Click Here to Read what the University of Minnesota's Raptor Centre said


And no, I'm not saying that Adam Khoo's workshop or the clips are bogus. In fact, the clip is quite true when it applies to us, humans, than to the eagles. Because it shows that in order to live on and be successful in the near future, one has to be able to let go of the past and move on. Or as how the saying goes "In Order To Rebuild, You Must First Tear Down".


And that my friends, is an important lesson to learn.



As for what I want to be if I ever get the chance to, I'd like to be The One who controls everything that happens on Earth (I'm not allowed to say His name for I do not have a religion and may be doomed to burn in Hell). It would be fine even if it were to be for a day. I would just like to reshuffle some things, here and there.



Loves.

Dreams

Have you ever slept in bed, only to wake up from the oddest dream you have ever had?

sleeping by *Coffee-Monster on deviantART


Dreams.. What do they really mean?

(From Wikipedia.org):

Dreams are sequence images, sounds and feelings experienced while sleeping, particularly strongly associated with rapid eye movement sleep. The contents and biological purposes of dreams are not fully understood, though they have been a topic of speculation and interest throughout recorded history. The scientific study of dreams is known as oneirology.




It may sound pretty strange, but I have been having the same dream every single night. And it is either a repeat of the dream, or a continuation (like a series) of the dream.

I wouldn't say that it is enjoyable, because it's about being in a relationship with someone I know, someone that I wouldn't say I like a lot.

But in the dream, everything seems so real, from where our hands met, to the places we went.

It's kind of freaky. And every since last week(when I had been getting the same dream), I try to delay my sleeping time, or better yet, not fall asleep at all. Because every time I fall asleep, the same dream appears.


So what does this dream really mean?

My mum thinks it has something to do with being deprived from love. Hahaha.

And some friends say that maybe it's a hint, to rethink of my judgment towards this guy, maybe he isn't that bad after all.


But who knows what it really means? And what am I to do, to stop these dreams from coming back?


I need sleep, but I can't. In fact, I don't want to. So what am I supposed to do?

Childhood

People have been asking me "why do you keep changing your blog skin?"

Well, my answer is really simple. I want to be a chameleon who keeps changing it's skin colour, and to never reveal it's true self to anyone. But to me, I'll reveal my true self to my family and to the people whom i respect alot.




Anyway, moving on..







And if you're guessing who that is, that's me. you idiots..
Anyway, the reason why i put that photo up is to show to people how much I've changed, be it character or appearance.

And you might be thinking again. "oh, it cant be Kethlyn. The picture above looks so angelic but the Kethlyn i now know is a devil in disguise."

Well people, I may not admit to being a devil in disguise but as a kid, when i was in kindergarten, i used to beat the boys up in my class, just because they took away the box of toys that i wanted. I used to switch off the lights in the toilets and make everyone scream their lungs out. Some kids even cried because they were afraid of the dark. Ahaha. Yes, i was mischievous then. But i always got away. How? Just by smiling innocently at the teachers or my parents and they'll forgive me instantaneously.


But as a kid, i used to think that everything was fun, and that everyday was play time for me.

During my childhood times,

1. I loved plucking a wing of flies and see how they try to fly. I couldn't help it,
i was curious.

2. I loved sitting under the void decks and see the ants move around me, maybe
squishing one or two, just to "spoil" the line of ants.

3. I loved jumping on the Ants' nests and drag someone to stand there, so that that
person gets bitten all over.

4. I loved sitting on the swings, swinging as high as possible, never stopping.
Unless, it was time for me to go home.

5. I loved swimming and imagined myself as one of the representative for Singapore
Swimmers, competing with Jocelyn Yeo and Nicolette Teo.

6. However, even though i loved swimming, i hated being tanned.

7. My brothers used to lie to me and said that by eating Black soya sauce, it would
make me darker, and from then onwards i totally avoid eating black sauce. Until i
reached Primary 3 when i realised that what they told me was a bunch of bogus.

8. I LOVE CUDDLING up to someone. No matter who they are, i would just cuddle up beside them and try my best to make it squeezy and cozy for myself. My mother finds it irritating because she thinks that i make her perspire more.

9. I loved watching all sorts of cartoons. Anime were my favourite but as time passed, "Barney and Friends" as well and "Sesame Street" became my favourites.

10. I would always snack on chocolate( without it, i would go all weak) or those tit bits that you could find it those tin containers that olden "mama shops" used to sell. 50 cents per biscuit.

11. I loved dogs, and i still do!

12. I LOVE soft toys. And i still have that LOVE for them, but my parents think that I'm too old to have any. Pfft.

13. Hopscotch used to be my favourite game. I remember once when i would sneak to my neighbor's house because they had a hop scotch drawn on their floor.

14. I love charity work. Till now, i do.

15. I loved reading books( especially mysteries), doing crossword puzzles and jigsaw puzzles. I guess i still do. And my main aim now is to be the new director for "the Saw 4". Hopefully, i can have a sick and twisted mindset that people have to sacrifice something in order to gain their freedom. Hoho.

16. And lastly, I have a love for music. I used to play the organ but dropped out halfway because my parents realised that we had to keep upgrading the organ and it was fucking expensive. My love now goes to the drums. Woohoo.


Well, i still love doing all of the above now. But, the reason why i stopped doing it is because there is no time. Although Life is the longest thing in my life, but the hours on each day is not enough to fit any of this in.

So i guess we let bygones be bygones?