The past two weeks had me thinking through about a lot of things. And as I reminisced the past, I became more and more worried about the future; worried about how quickly time can pass without any realization at all.
Have you ever had the feeling where you wanted to shut yourself out from the world, or just to have a break, but the moment you take a seat, you have to heave yourself up to scatter to the next destination because there was no time?
The past few days working in the zoo was one of the best and worst times of my life. But as weird as it may sound, I quit the job. My family members were really shocked and till today, have been asking me to think it over. My colleagues in the zoo have asked me to not give up too, and found it really weird for me to quit on the evaluation day because they knew I had all my scripts down.
But the reason why I quit was not because I was nervous, or stressed about the scripts. In fact, it was thanks to the scripts that I managed to learn and know so much about the animals. Well, the actual reason to why I quit was because I lost passion for hosting.
Being in the zoo gave me so much time to get to know all the staffs and animals better. And I must admit that I do envy the animals a lot, for they have the best people to take care of them; their devoted keepers. The reason why I have so much respect for the keepers is not only because they take care, clean their dens and feed the animals, but because they actually spend more time in the zoo,than with their families. In fact, all the keepers would stay overnight if their animals are sick or going to give birth. Can you imagine the number of hours they put in for these animals?
Being in the zoo also gave me time to see how the zoo was run, and how the token feeders (my job) did their job. That was where it struck me, and hard. See, the more I familiarized with the zoo, the more I wanted to do something for the animals and it's not merely talking about them, I wanted more action. Don't get me wrong, token feeders are in fact one of the most important people in the zoo, because they are actually the voice for the animals. But I guess after two weeks at the zoo, I couldn't stand the same routine done over and over again. I must say, that all the show presenters are excellent in what they do, and memorizing script isn't that easy you know. But for me, I don't think I can stay still long enough, to do the many scripts day after day. I'm not saying it's boring, it's more like, not my cup of tea. Over the past two weeks, I realized that hosting afterall wasn't my taste and as always, I still do prefer teaching.
But the animals and their keepers have indeed left a very deep mark in my heart, so I'll most probably be a volunteer there, or at the SPCA, where I would indeed get a chance to help the animals in need.
Many said that my decision was a hasty one, and some said that I was dumb to quit from a high paying job. Well, I wouldn't want to lie and say that money doesn't matter, because it does. But like what Mr Raymond Huang always say, nothing's worth doing if you ain't got the heart for it. And just like this job, I love the animals more and more each day, but as the days go by, I lose the heart for hosting.
Well, that means I'm pretty much jobless right now. It's a confusing kind of feeling you know. i want to work because it's better than being at home doing nothing. Besides earning cash during the holidays is better than bumming around, and not helping your parents with the household "crisis". But at the same time, I want to treasure my youth! And hang out with friends and catch up on the good old times.
Oh well, what's done is done. I'm still going for interviews and stuff, but if I really don't feel like it, I'd probably just help my mum out in her holiday kids programme. So friends, if you want to meet up, I'm just a call away!
Oh yah, now that I'm jobless, this gives me more time to blog! hahah.
Loves.
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