Thanks for ripping me apart.

I have been skipping training for a long long time. I mean, during the holidays. But after that, i have been back on track and in training.

All my life, i have never dreamed of being in main 12, or even to carry on training. I have never ever dreamed of competing with any of you guys.

But recently , alot of mishaps has been happening.

Surprisingly, i got selected to be one of the main 12 players in volleyball, although i missed alot of trainings and i have been back in training and am the only without a jersey.

Now, i feel really guilty because people find it unfair that i got selected even though my attendance sucked.

I do understand but, it wasn't me who volunteered to be in the main. If i had a chance, i would definitely opt to sit on the bench, or not even get to participate.
People have been making me feel so bad because of the repeating of " not fair". What can i do? I know that my attendance sucks and i shouldn't even be getting a jersey. I am not acting like someone, trying to get people's sympathy. I don't need all that crap.

okay, fine. I shall find Ms Lim tomorrow and tell her that i would not want to play and just let me be. I can't fucking take the blame just because i got selected into the main 12. i don't feel comfortable being in a team where people hate me for being selected.

I'm like freaking pissed off at the fact that other people have not gotten selected and i got the blame for it. Life is GREAT and with the help of these people, life HAS IMPROVED.

This is a place where freedom of speech is legal, and if you hate what i wrote, remember that ignorance is bliss.


EVERYTHING IS MY FAULT BECAUSE SOME PEOPLE HAS NOT BEEN SELECTED. AND PEOPLE FIND IT NOT FAIR THAT I GOT SELECTED. MY SKILLS HAS DETEORATED, MY ATTENDANCE IS EVEN MORE DRASTIC AND YET I GOT SELECTED.


I WAS BROKEN, AND YOU GUYS FIXED ME UP WITH GLUE. BUT WHEN IT WAS DRYING UP, YO GUYS RIPPED ME APART AGAIN. WONDERFUL.