As the days go by...

     2012 on a whole has been an amazing year for me. It started out with my graduation (that I skipped), which also involved competing hard to earn a medal (but I lost). Then the sleepless nights that I spent working on university and scholarship applications. Followed by... Finding out about my acceptances and rejections, and making the decision to take a gap year. Finally, applying for a job, landing it and dealing with the 'working world'. 

     Within that short time span of 12 months, I transformed from a student, into a working adult, and had to make shifts in mentality, maturity and motivation. I was no longer the kid who ran around the atrium, spending sleepless nights because of the overdose of coca-cola and projects. Instead, I was an educator who had to teach, influence and role-model. I could no longer make simple mistakes for every move I made was monitored. The pressure increased tenfold when I was thrown into the deep end of the sea. I learned about the harsh reality of 'termination' of my colleagues, and about survival. It might be a blessing in disguise, but after twenty years, I finally understood what my dad meant by "It's a dog eats dog world out there". 

     As much as I would like to scare you with the 'real world', there are rainbows and sunshine after the storm. As always, I had my fair share of fun and laughter. Dressing up as a Red Indian, playing with a leaf blower, jumping on a trampoline, getting my whole class of kids to go on a Treasure Hunt, 'acting' as The Big Bad Wolf in a skit, and going on field trips were just some of the stuff I got to do at work. That aside, staying in touch with old friends, and making new ones through workshops, overseas projects, volunteering, and socializing (unfortunately)  most definitely expanded my social circle. The greatest highlight of all, would be to finally be able to independently purchase flight tickets to travel (twice in month at that!).

     So much has happened, and I know that I should be be happy. However, deep down inside me, I feel emptier than before. It might be because I have not had an 'ah huh!' moment, or maybe because I have not made any new discoveries about myself. Or maybe I have not consolidated all the 'moments' just as yet. Maybe because... I don't know. I spent the last week of the year, trying to figure what exactly was making me feel so hollow inside, but it is already 2013 and I still do not have the answer. The possibilities are endless. Nevertheless, it would not kill to be positive. I want to believe that the hollowness in me is a cry for a greater adventure, and I hope that there is one awaiting. For you, for me, and for anyone keen on traveling on the road to self-discovery :)